One of the things that parents so often ask me if they are having a problem with their child's teacher is, "What can we do?" Many times parents believe that their child's education at school is out of their hands. Well, that is not true. First and foremost it is important to know that you are your children's biggest supporters and advocates. Part of the reason some kids fall through the cracks is because parents trust the system too much. It is our job, as parents, to ensure that our kids are getting the full attention, treatment, and services they need in school. In other words, we must advocate on their behalf. There are 4 things that are important to remember when advocating for your child that will make your life easier and make your child's experience at school better.
1. Get to know your child. While this may seem simplistic and redundant, it isn't. It is important to understand what your child can and can't do in terms of their academic and social skills so that you can best advocate for her. This means that you must observe your child while doing academic tasks, such as reading, writing, counting, math (depending on his age and grade level). Gather evidence to share with the teacher about what your child can do and does at home. Sometimes, a child will perform one way at home and another at school. For this reason, parents should bring in the books that their kids read, writing and art samples that they have created, and any math that they can do. This is important information to share with the teacher so that she can better meet your child's needs. Keep this evidence in a folder and bring it into school to share with the teacher.
2. Make an appointment to talk to the teacher--you have the right to meet with your children's teachers at any point during the year. You do not have to wait until conference time to talk to the teacher to let him know what he can do to help your child. Remember, you know your child best, particularly if you have observed him in different situations and have the evidence, as discussed above, of what he can do academically at home. If your kids are having problems at school, then this information will be very helpful to the teachers so that she can meet their needs.
3. During the meeting with the teacher, base what you say on the evidence that you have. One issue that teachers have with parents is that they can get emotional or defensive about their children. A good way to battle this problem is to base what you know about her in her actual skills and accomplishments. Use the work samples that you have gathered about your child as the basis of the meeting. That way, you will have a common neutral ground from which to discuss your child's skills and needs. After this type of discussion hopefully you will feel satisfied that the teacher understands your perspective and knows how to best meet your child's needs in the classroom.
If not, then:
4. Make an appointment to meet with the principal. Bring the same evidence with you to use as a starting point in the discussion of your child's needs at the school and with her teacher. It is very useful for the principal to see the same information about your child that you shared with the teacher. State your concerns in relation to meeting your child's needs academically and emotionally at the school. Remember, the school faculty and administration do want the kids to succeed and be content with their learning experience, usually a win-win situation.
Most importantly, never forget that you, the parents, are the primary advocates and educators for your children. Learning begins at home. The most successful students have parents that are behind them and supporting them all along the way.
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